Yep. In one short month, our whole life is changing. Four days ago, my hubby gave his 2 week notice at the place he has worked for 9 years. I know God has used him and taught him a lot while he's there, but I am very excited for him to move on and hopefully do something that he enjoys more and work somewhere where he is valued more - after all, their motto is "Expect more (from your employees), Pay (them) less." His last night there is 9 days from now. And in 2 1/2 weeks, he'll be getting on a plane to Iowa and starting his new career - yep, my hubby the trucker ;). I am so excited for this new opportunity, but I know it will probably be a very difficult year. I may only see him two days a week, if I'm lucky. But this is just the next step to get him the experience he needs. Our hope is that in a year or so, he'll have enough experience to get a local driving job.

You thought that was a big change! Just wait, I'm barely getting started! Next week, we'll be saying goodbye to our wonderful, humble home in New Hill and moving in with my parents. They have two bedrooms that only get used about 3 or 4 weeks out of a year, and we have an urgent need to save money. So there it is... I will definitely miss this home and it will be a big adjustment, but there are so many positives about being there, that I am looking forward to it (especially since once I started packing, it's hard to stop, and I'm just ready to get it all done and move on). Since both Mom and Dad work, I'm hoping I can help with dinners and cleaning. Also, since John will be gone so much, it will be nice not to spend every evening alone with just Brooke.

And finally, our second home, our second family, is closing. The church plant that we have been a part of for the last 4 years is closing its doors. The people there really are like family, and it will be very difficult to adjust to not seeing them every week. It's certainly not unexpected, and it would have been difficult for us to continue going, since we'll be an hour away. But it is still very bittersweet. Our last day will be July 31st. I plan on tearing up.

A month ago, I was stressed and confused because we had no idea what our life was going to look like. We weren't sure about John's job, or where we'd be living, or if our church would still be there. I like knowing better (I'm a planner - I can't help it). In one short month, we'll be moving, changing churches, and John will be changing jobs. I'm excited for the future, but also nervous and uncertain. But I know that God will provide for us and direct us and that He is sovereign over everything. Change is difficult, but it's also exciting, and I know God will use us and work in our lives.

You know how every time God closes a door, somewhere He always opens a window? Well, what happens when every time you start to go through that window, another door opens up? Do you keep awkwardly climbing out that window, or do you take a step back so you can go through that open door? The last time this happened, you had one leg over the window sill, so you took that leg back inside and made a b-line for that open door. And just before you got there, it slammed in your face.

So now what? You decided to try the window again and now you're in the exact same spot, leg up over the sill, and another door opens wide. Couldn't God just close the window? Or close the door? Or keep the door open until you get through? And eventually that window is going to get ticked that you keep backing down, and it's just going to slam right on your fingers.

I just keep praying for God's direction and maybe He'll give some more obvious sign to these two thick heads.

7 months ago I didn't want to teach (*gasp*). For one thing, I was tired of coming up against walls and closed doors and people who, for one reason or another, didn't want to hire me. But even more than that, I was grateful for the first 6 months of marriage not being filled with stress and long hours making lesson plans and grading papers. Then I had the opportunity to tutor, which was great. I enjoyed teaching someone who cared about the work that she did. I enjoyed not having to deal with administration or government regulations that make it the teacher's fault if a student fails. And I especially loved the idea of helping out parents who want to give their children the best education they can, but may be lacking in a certain skill (grammar, writing, etc.). And having small classes and making my own curriculum are incredible benefits as well. The fact that public school teaching has lost its appeal, and that the door has opened to private tutoring, along with a knowledge that I will not be teaching forever (family will always be a priority), have all caused a major paradigm shift.

I loved the idea of teaching when I was in school - even when I was in the public schools for student teaching. But maybe God just gave me that drive so I could finish strong. And I do love most of it, but I don't love stress. And I don't want teaching to consume my life. I want my church and husband and family to come first in my life, and my job to come after that. So maybe I'm not ready for a career. There might be a time someday when I am, but for now, it's not me.

So my plan is to teach small classes and/or tutor individual students. Right now, I have nothing solid for the fall, but I know that God will provide. And until an opportunity to tutor comes along, I'll be working as a substitute. All the stress of classroom management, none of the stress of grading or lesson plans. Since announcing my move from the lucrative career of thrift store pricer to substitute teacher, many people have said, "Oh, at least you'll have your foot in the door." I may have one foot in that door, but I'm headed in the opposite direction.

I think sometimes God changes our desires. He changes our hearts and our passions to lead us where He wants to take us.